925. - Naomi Fry

All right, uh, this episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by Stateside with Kai and Carter, a new podcast from The Guardian. And they are using this podcast to slow down the news and wrestle with the questions that we all have about what's happening in the world. And they do it 3 times a week. Jason, does that sound familiar to you?

We don't really talk about, you know, a lot of international global news items and climates and cultures and sports and things like that. We do talk about fashion and wellness, but for everything else, Kai and Carter are a great place.

All right, so who couldn't use more news? Listen wherever you get your podcasts or watch on YouTube. Sometimes I'm stupid. Uh, Chris Black, New York City baby. The door's cracked, the birds are chirping, the guys are hooping, life is good. Spring has sprung, at least for today. Them jeans, what's really poppin'?

Mm, you said the door is cracked, like your front door? Or you mean like the windows are open?

No, it's the door to the balcony is cracked. So I said what I meant, okay? I'm standing on business today.

Okay, good, yeah, I mean, we're having a brief little reprieve from our heat wave. It might have a little sprinkle action later on today, which we need so much because of the fires that are always happening here, but. Otherwise, it's great. Another day in P, that's short for Paradise. Just drinking a little Blue Ice Magna, a little coffee with a little MCT oil in it.

Okay, I'm not beating the manosphere, not feeding the manosphere charges, and I, I like it, goddamn it. Yeah, that's right, I like it.

Yeah, I'm doing, you know, I'm holding, I'm holding a 25 right now just between my legs, just doing some deep squats. I'm getting in there.

I'm holding— I was like, what gun is that? And I was like, oh, he's talking about a weight.

What's up with me? Why would I go to Shout out to my Canali family who sent me a Canali candle. Kind of smells like you too, Paws.

It smells like what?

You. Remember when I said that, that, uh—

Oh, oh yes. I gotta buy that. I gotta buy that.

The Freddie Moll hand soap smells like you. And now I'm saying this Canali candle smells you. It's very everything reminds me of her ass sentiment happening right now.

Uh, I went to, um, Ruthie Rogers had her book party last night at, um, the Michael, Michael Bloomberg Foundation on 78th Street.

Uh, can you confirm that old bitch is winning, bro?

Old bitches. I gotta say something, and, and I don't want to speak out of turn, but it was great to see Ruthie. Congratulations. It was a good crowd. I was the youngest person there.

Youngest in charge. Did Ruthie remember you, bro?

Ruthie, I walk up the steps. This is why she's a pro. I walk up the steps, first person I see, Chris, how are you? How was your dinner at the rest— you know, the pro. I'm very—

a pro.

Um, we talked for a little while, but it's wifey. Graydon was there. Of course, all the old heads were there. Bloomberg, obviously. But then I saw, you know, there's Secret Service outside. And I was like, you know, this doesn't seem— I know these guys ain't showing up for low-level, you know, local politicians. I know Zoran's busy having, you know, falafel with Action Bronson. He wouldn't be here.

And Secret Service more likely to be there for Martha Stewart than the current mayor.

Martha was there. Martha was there. But, but then I saw, then I saw Jill Biden and bro, Jill Biden looking good.

I'm not—

Jill, Jill, you know, you know, Joe ain't hitting it right. Yeah, I think Jill was out here. I didn't check her finger, but I don't know if there was a ring. I think Jill might have been shot. You know, I think Jill could have low been shop— low-key shopping for a new man.

Okay, so you are saying that, okay, Jill Biden is DTF is what you're saying.

No, I'm not saying that. I'm saying that— I'm saying that she looks good as hell.

You say you— so you're saying you were—

you're—

you wouldn't mind if Jill was biting on that thing?

Yeah, that's it. That's what— that's what I'm saying. I was just saying I didn't— I'd never looked at Jill in that light, and then last night I was like, damn, Jill look— looks good. Look really good. I just want to give her— I just want to give her a shout out for that. I just want to—

that's all, Mama.

Yeah, I'm just trying to give her— I'm just trying to get— look, her husband is comatose. Who knows where he— he doesn't know where he is. She doesn't know where he is.

Yeah. And also, it's 2026, you know, Field app. She probably has that pulled up. You know, the, the sanctimony of, of monogamy is not what it once was back in the day.

No, Joe and I— once Joe lost all of his mental facilities, we are actually open. Yeah. So it's, it's, it's been, it's been challenging for us, but It's, it's, he's working on his library and we'll see what happens.

I wonder if there's going to be a situation where, you know, like they'll include where people are like, look, I'm going to get it in writing. If I ever get to the point where, you know, XYZ, I'm a vegetable or I get this thingy, you got to pull the plug on me. Don't let me, you know, don't let me live out the last 10 years of my life as a fucking vegetable or whatever. Is there going to be a thing where our greatest dogs are like, you know what, if I don't ever— if I can never really tap it again, if I have a weird thing with my dick or whatever it might be, you have my permission. You have my permission to start fucking.

Yeah, I mean, I look—

I think the fucking clause—

I don't know, man. I was just taken aback. I was just taken aback because in a room like that full of old heads, um, you know, some stand out. And I, I just wanted to say that about Jill.

You know, it's weird because I was I had a follow-up question. I'm going to need your honesty on this one.

Of course.

At some point in the Escalade home, did we Google Jill Biden young on Google Image Search?

Actually, no, I didn't. No, I didn't. Great, great, great idea and great question. That actually, that feels like something a woman would do about both a man or a woman. It feels like a female trait.

What would it say if I have it pulled up right now? Does that mean I'm a female?

No, that means we're—

Or I just, I think like a woman, act like a man.

We're not talking about Madea, but I think we're in the—

quite the opposite of Madea.

I think we're in the clear on this because I think we're podcasting. So this is our job. In this case, you're just merely doing your job as a professional.

It's called service journalism reportage. And also, you know, because let's not forget, as I'm looking up, you know, photos of them when they were younger, obviously Jill Biden was a baddie if you believe her current 74-year-old self.

So she was looking— she was looking— she was looking good at 28.

Yeah, I hope you're sitting down. This— yeah, the 74-year-old woman was also attractive at 22.

Yeah, well, I, I've, I've, you know, I've been shocked by, uh, lesser things.

But here's the other thing to consider, because, you know, every, every toxic hoe in my life, they're like, you know what, Hunter could get it, Hunter.

They created that.

Don't forget where Hunter— don't forget where Hunter came from. I just sent you the pic.

Oh, they do look great. You're right. They do look great. They look like great rich people living in Delaware, which is, is probably what they were at this point. I wonder where he was in his career, but you're— I mean, I didn't even think about the fact that Hunter being one of, one of the greatest stickmen and crack users that we've ever seen.

Yeah.

Um, it had to come from good stock. Um, maybe not mentally, but physically at least good stock.

Damn. Also, I just sent you a photo. We got, we got Judge, Judge Joe Biden. He's got He's got the nice sweater on with the little Oxford underneath, little collar poking, the Detroit Tigers ball cap.

He looks good.

He looks— he looks— he looks kind of Ryland Maxing a little bit here. It kind of looks like he is—

he is right. No, that is— which I think Ryland would take that as a compliment. Happy birthday. Actually, it's Ryland's birthday today.

Yeah, happy birthday, Ryland, to you. And also happy Trans Visibility Day, unrelated to you, Ryland, just in general. That also happens to fall on today. So shout out to all the trans homies. Nothing but love for y'all.

Nothing but love. Um, my friend Brooks was there. Brooks who, who reads, who, who lives in Charleston, has the restaurants. Uh, he came up from Substack, right? Also from Substack. I saw Brooks get introduced to Martha Stewart, and I think Martha was— I think Martha said, let me get a bite. I think Martha, I think Martha said, what, I, I'm, I would love to try the Leon's Fried Chicken, you know what I'm saying? I think it's a little bit— I think it was— I think there was a lot of that going on because there were some young you know, young but not too young guys in the building and a lot of older women, you know what I mean? Thank God Alex came, or I could have— I could have been kidnapped by Secret Service, you know what I mean? Like, it could have been bad.

Okay, so they were— so the good people over there decided to sort of pepper the room with some talent, as they say. And it's nice in 2026 to see those roles reversed.

And I think that was—

as we said at the top of the hour, old bitches stay winning and old bitches stay employing some young meat to come. Why don't you come sit on my lap? You know, that kind of—

I just thought it was— I just thought it was funny. I just thought it was funny.

Get Mama another brandy.

Yeah, exactly. Where's my snifter? Um, yeah, it was, it was fun. And then we went to, to, uh, have you been to Elios before? Elios Uptown on— it's like on like— it was great. It's just like the rare restaurant that you go in in 2026, and I'm— I might have been the only guy not wearing a blazer.

Oh wow.

Which is— and it was a busy— it was a beautiful night, so it was like packed. But I was just like, damn, on a Monday, no less. On a Monday, it was ripping. Yeah.

Wow. I'm looking at Elios on the delicious.com website. Photo of the crowd that they use. Not looking so hot.

Just—

well, I mean, it's not a blazer in sight.

It's old. It's also an old crowd. It was an old crowd type of night last night in New York City.

Okay. Well, I guess it was a good thing that you were out as well. Hey, don't do that. Yeah. So while you're doing that, while you're rubbing elbows, I'm over here in Glendale doing my Hot Girl Walk with Bean, and there was— I live near a school, so there's always parents doing drop-off and shit.

Oh, hey, you probably shouldn't be saying that, but sure.

Yeah, I didn't say which. I didn't say which one.

No, I'm not— I'm not saying you're giving up your location. I'm just saying you in general living near a school, it just don't seem—

oh, because of my previous convictions.

Got it.

Those records are sealed.

I know they're expired, they're sealed.

Yeah. And there's, there's a group of 3 dads, you know, kind of like my age or so, maybe a couple years older. They had just dropped their kids off and they were kind of walking, walking and chatting, having a spirited convo. And as I was approaching them, I, I turned my New Yorker podcast off and I turned my noise cancellation off just to, you know, in case they want to throw me a, hey TJ, big fan or whatever it is, I can hear what they say. And as I approach them, they are all discussing a film and the film is Inside Out 2.

Damn.

And I was like, bro, what is going on here?

That's, that's rough. Like they were discussing it like we work in Hollywood and we're discussing it?

I don't know. I don't know. And also it's not like the movie, like it, I just Googled it right now. The movie came out a couple of years ago, so it's not necessarily like, oh yeah, it's not like we had to, you know, are going to go see it this weekend or whatever, you know what I mean?

Dude, this is why I don't know.

When I'm watching, you know, people who are, you know, our age-ish, whatever, you know, late 30s, early 40s who are having children, you know, later in life. Compared to where, you know, our parents' generation having kids in their 20s or whatever. You really see that adults are no longer in charge anymore. And, you know, I'm not the first person to say that, but adults nowadays are just in service of their child until they are, you know, well, well into their 20s.

Until they're going into debt to pay for them to go to college for a degree they won't use.

Yeah.

It's, I mean, it's just, You're a servant to this child. And back when we were kids, it's just like, we're gonna go to a place, mommy and daddy gonna do their thing, y'all. 'Cause we were talking about this as well when we were in Vegas with a couple other people, food writer Jason Lee and his friend. And we were talking about how—

I wanna talk to Jason. I wanna give him a shout out. I really love following along to his airport. It was a really good, him being 4 hours. It was just great. It was everything. I usually hate that kind of content, but he really nailed it.

Yeah. Waking up up at like 4 AM to arrive in Las Vegas at like 10:30 or something like that. Just an all day long travel day to go on. I guess that flight is what, 3 and a half, 4 hours?

I don't know.

Anyway, we were talking about how when, you know, when we were kids and your parents would go to Vegas, every casino had a massive arcade that you would just dump your kids at. Yeah. You know, give them a bunch of money. Here's some quarters. Mommy and daddy are going to do everything. And you can just hang out with local teens from all over the world, play a little Mortal Kombat. Maybe one of them's got a little grass, maybe one of them stole a couple pills, maybe you can sneak a little mai tai from the pool or whatever. Sure. And you guys go have fun and blah, blah, blah. And that's what it is. And now it's just like, you know, the kid is just yelling at the mommy. It's as if a horse-drawn carriage was being directed by the horse and not the— Damn, don't bring the carriage master.

You always be throwing shade at Mr. Ed. I don't fuck with that. Uh, we had— all right, so look, we're gonna be honest with you guys.

Um, luckily we have a mother on our podcast today who can chime in on this.

A rapper that you all know and love had to reschedule for next week, and you know what, in, in service of this podcast and our audience, our dedicated audience that shows us love 3 times a week, we decided to get a fan favorite, a mother of How Long Gone, the First Lady of How Long Gone.

Mm-hmm.

Icon off the bench. You know, she moved some stuff around. She's a very, very busy woman. She moved some stuff around. She made time. And Nomi Frye is joining us today on How Long Gone. It's a special treat. And I just want to thank you for clearing the cow, Nomi, because that's big. Every time I go to the doctor, I walk out of that bitch feeling dumb. I got no real info. This guy in a white coat just say, you're fine, you know, drink more water.

He knows how to charge my copay.

Exactly.

That's about it.

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This episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by our best friends at BetterHelp. Jason, we're, we're deep into May, which is, uh, Mental Health Awareness Month, and this is just a reminder that whatever you're going through, you don't have to go through it alone. Life is a damn journey. Some days feel good and others feel overwhelming. Whatever's keeping you up at night, it's easy to feel like you have to figure it all out on your own, but the truth is no one has all the answers. Well, and no journey should be alone. Having someone with you to listen, to understand, and to support you can really make all the difference.

I agree, Chris. And sometimes, you know, it, it's nice to be talking to somebody even if they're not even listening, even if you don't even get to be in the same room with them, because what you're doing is you're admitting these things to yourself. And that's the most— that's the most rewarding thing you can do sometimes. So you can have a great little therapy sesh with your perfect therapist at BetterHelp, choosing between over 30,000 people so you can get the right one just for you. Over 6 million people globally are using it and, you know, have some breakthroughs. Go on that walk after your BetterHelp sesh, you know, whatever it might be. Get a nice little lunch all for yourself, maybe a non-alcoholic kombucha, and just think and be like, damn, I really am him. You don't have to be on this journey alone. Find support and have somebody with you in therapy. Sign up and get 10% off at betterhelp.com/howlong. That is betterhelp.com/howlong.

This episode of How Long Gone is brought to you by a new podcast from The Guardian, Stateside with Kai and Carter. This is covering a lot of our bases, Jason. It's a It's trying to slow down the news and wrestle with the questions we all have about what's happening in the world. And I know you particularly have quite a lot of questions.

A lot of questions. But how often— because we do this podcast 3 times a week and that's a sweet spot— how many times do they do 3 times a week?

And I, I have a feeling just based on the platform and these talking points that they're maybe going to be covering different stuff than we do. That's just a guess.

The Guardian is not some billionaire-owned platform. They're not afraid to say what they want to say, brother.

Yeah, Rupert ain't sniffing around in, in what, uh, journalists Ky Wright and Carter Sherman are up to over there at Stateside. But yeah, listen wherever you get your podcasts. You can watch on YouTube. It's 3 times a week. And who couldn't use more news, you know, especially when it's not, you know, from here, let's say. Give it a listen. Give it a listen.

Spotify doesn't deserve this.

Thank you guys. It's a pleasure to be here as always.

You sound ecstatic.

I know, it is. It's a pleasure.

Just joking.

You know, I am, as you said, Chris, I am a busy mother, so I'm, you know, I'm juggling a million things. I'm dancing as fast as I can. And, uh, but you know, when the boys, when the boys come calling, you gotta, you gotta take Nina to Rough Trade to pick up some new LPs.

You know, it's, it's just, it never ends as a mom.

I broke a guitar string last night. What the fuck, Mom?

I said I wanted a Telecaster. This is bullshit.

Well, you know that Nina is actually— her guitar is actually Joe Coscarelli's guitar from when he was a young, a young man.

Oh, he handed it down. That is— that's nice. It's nice for him. It's nice to do that considering he has his own child and he said, fuck it.

I know, but you know what? It's going to be a little bit— he's— because he's behind me in the—

that's true.

That's true.

In the parenting game. And so You know, it's going to be a little bit. I'm sure Nina will be happy.

She could maybe pass it back to—

Exactly. I'm sure she would be happy to give young Tony the guitar back.

She'll add it. She'll add a few decals, a few stickers, maybe of her own vintage pavement from eBay. Yeah.

Did Joe's guitar come with any old stickers on it, or was it— was the hard drive wiped?

No. Okay. I will—

factory reset. He took off the— he was able to take off the Taking Back Sunday sticker to not embarrass himself.

One of the only guys with a Mobb Deep sticker on his— on his purple telly.

One of the few, the few—

there were signs.

Um, all right, Fry, what's going on? Are you at home? You at work? Where are you?

I'm at home. I will actually go to the office later. I'm usually mostly at home.

Girl, same.

Yeah, I actually got dressed for you guys. Usually I'm like literally like in— and you're just wearing your Cuckoo Intimates at home, an oversized like Kathy Comic like t-shirt.

I was able to put on a shirt today too. Usually I wear my house hoodie. Um, depending on what's the house hoodie right now. The house hoodie is a, um, special edition Roots, uh, Outpost, because Roots, the Canadian brand, they opened a special Rosedale Outpost, which is a, um, high-end neighborhood that I am familiar with and love. So they sent me the pack over Christmas. So that's that right now. Right now I'm representing Roots.

So the house hoodie, that's what you wear during winter times. It's your comfy cozy thing. You get home from your cocktail mix mixer, and then you take the tux off, you throw your house hoodie on. Follow-up: how, how many— how often are we washing the house hoodie?

Oh, the house hoodie gets washed weekly. Okay. I wouldn't say I wear it every day, but I pair it with— I have several different colors of the Tekla sleep shorts.

You do, you do love the Tekla shorts.

I would recommend these to any, any man or woman that's lounging.

Okay.

And, and then obviously you pair those with an Ugg, you know, an Ugg slipper, right?

A kind of a low-cut Ugg, a low-rise Ugg, the low-cut Ugg slipper.

Or if you're— if you're— if I've had a— if, if I've had a big day, you do the— you do the Hoka recovery slides if you need to kind of get your plantar fasciitis. If your dogs are—

if you were— if you were running the Westside Highway 4 AM or whatever, you and Bobby Flay, yeah, throw on the Hoks. Or, I mean, and shout out to my friends at Nike for sending me my pregame Mules.

Look at these things. These things are— and these are your size?

Wow.

This is an amazing piece of footwear because they look like they have rollers on the bottom, even though those are— they don't move.

Yeah, so these are these little orange balls, and each ball absorbs and adjusts to the contour to recover. And the irony, the only people that seem to wear it are like professional athletes and just drug dealers. That's all it— I mean, I guess that's Nike's.

How do they feel on your feet though?

They're good. They're a little, they're a little heavy.

Well, you're not supposed to, you're not supposed to do anything but kind of You wear those when you're shuffling from the locker room to the massage table to the sauna, you know what I mean? Okay, I'm gonna put them on because it feels like maybe that's your version of, you know how when you are a grocery, you know, you work at the grocery store and you're a bagger and they have a little pad down for you to stand on all day so you don't— this could be your version of that when you're podcasting.

You know what it reminds me of? Remember in the aughts when there were these sneakers for weight loss?

Did they propel your foot forward or were they just heavy? Like the—

it was called like MBT or something. I don't remember. Or MBS.

No, not MBS.

Okay.

MBT. MBT.

They were MBT.

They had, they had like a little concave thing where they always rolled. They were, they were never flat.

Yes, they rolled and it was supposed to kind of help you. I don't know what, I guess burn more calories as you walked or something. I'm not sure how it worked, but it was like. That sort of like desperate, like pre-Azempic time where like literally people would do anything. They would be like, I'll have like a concave shoe. I'll walk around the ball.

I think the idea— it's called the anti-shoe. And I think I just shared an image of it in the chat. Oh, really?

Oh, yes, yes, exactly.

It's meant to encourage the heel-toe style walking.

These are going to be— somebody's going to recommend these on Blackbird Spy Plane next week. These look, these, these look like a combination of kind of like an Osiris, you know, puffy DC skate shoe and a current, a modern cool running shoe. I could see these having a moment if they didn't look insane shape-wise.

Oh, well, well, we're calling it now. I feel like this is, we are calling it, this is on the verge of resurrection.

You know, they were, they were first to market, I believe. But there was also, of course, the Skechers Shape-Up, which, which stole the innovation technology of this. I shared an image as well in the chat. You can check that out.

But, you know, these do look, yeah. And the Skechers are not dissimilar in shape, just uglier in style.

That's debatable. And I'm going to share one more image. This could be a Y2K girly. It's a little kind of Mary Jane. No.

MTB.

I see. I feel like this has legs. This has feet. This has feet.

These are ugly as hell. This is, this is some, this is below barista right here. This is not.

I mean, a baddie wearing those, you know.

In our age, Nomi, maybe you don't remember this because you probably weren't poring over the pages of your dad's Sports Illustrated the way that I was. But there was a— there was the shoe that taught you how to jump during the Michael Jordan era that had the— it had sort of a—

that sounds familiar. That does sound familiar. Yeah.

Spring-like contraption on the front toe box.

Oh, on the front toe box. I thought it was more— oh, okay. Yeah.

It would like allow you to train. And I've maintained that if I practiced for a year, I could learn to dunk.

Oh.

If I, if I, if I was with a basketball trainer, but I would want to employ the use of those shoes because I think they look so cool.

Yes.

A little help, a little bump, if you will.

Those shoes were called the Strength.

A little shoe talk.

A little shoe talk up top, right?

Yeah. I just got new spring Vans.

Spring Vans.

Okay.

Do you buy your Vans seasonally?

Yeah.

What flavor? What flavor?

I like the sort of like cream, the cream color. Just like, you know, classic, classic low-top Vans.

What don't they go with?

What don't they go with? Exactly. And I had them for a long time and they were like really looking rough and I I, I kind of gave up and threw them out. Um, and so I got a new pair.

That's, that's bad. I've, I've unfortunately— my two pairs of cooked Vans are some of my favorite shoes that I own.

No, I know, I loved it. I love them, I love them. And in fact, I feel like I thought I had kept it, maybe like a hot threw them out or something.

Like, we actually talked about this a few months ago on the podcast about me. I was trying to come up with the formula to quickly add a patina to a pair of new Vans or Converse or whatever kind of canvas shoe where you, you know, the best way to do it, you know, go on a European vacation, wear them at the beach, they get a little salt water, sun bleaching. That's how you get that great Vans patina. And I was trying to come up with like some type of seaweed kombu dashi broth that you soak the shoes in. I think I remember those. Oh yes, I do remember them sitting out in the sun like how you would make fish sauce or a sun-dried tomato, perhaps.

Yeah, I love when sauces sit out in the sun. That's one of my favorite ways to kind of go old school.

So, Nomi, just send your shoes over to the house and I've got a couple formulas I've been whipping up.

What we used to do with Converse back in the, you know, obviously in the '90s, you'd run them over with your car.

Oh, wow. That's a very suburban— that's a very suburban—

You just go back and forth. Look, where I come from, we did have cars and I'm not trying to boast.

That sounds like MTV Jackass type behavior, bro. That's a little psycho to me.

No one's foot was in the shoe, just to be clear.

The shoe was—

the shoe was— On its own, it was—

you freaking put my shoes on the ground, freaking run it over the shopping cart. It's not even a big deal. I don't even care.

Not even a big— not even. All right, so you've been doing some— have you bought anything? Because I saw it last time I saw you. No, me, you were rocking a new high-end handbag. If you want to tell our listeners about your Bottega purchase.

You got another one, Fry? Damn, I got podcast money. Let's go.

I got— yes, exactly, that is what it is. I, I got, um, it's true, Chris, I'm actually still very happy with this bag. I got it on The RealReal. It is a Bottega. It's a kind of like pretty small— it's like a purse. I mean, it's nice size for a purse. It's not like a tiny thing where you can't put anything.

You know that—

you know that I've been shamed for saying purse because it's kind of like an old lady in Massachusetts term.

I was like, I just—

handbag sounds a little fussy to me, but purse sounds a little Adam and Steve as well though, you know.

Yeah, I think purse is totally fine, and I— if that's what my mom would say, then I feel uncomfortable saying it.

Yeah, it's kind of a mom word, but I think it's a purse because it's not a tote.

I think it's just a bag. I think the purse means, connotates a female.

Well, yeah. And a female is carrying this bag. So therefore it's a fucking purse.

It's true. In my case, I am surprisingly a female.

I'm just saying.

Sometimes I can't believe it myself.

I'm sorry that Jason's, I'm sorry that Jason's doing this to you.

He's misgendering me.

I'm not misgendering you. I'm saying You guys are toxic for gendering a bag, especially from the Bottega Veneta house.

I'm going to— if I'm going to be toxic—

our National Trans Awareness Day of all things.

If I'm going to be toxic, if I'm going to be toxic for something, I would say gendering a bag I'm comfortable with. That's the one place that I feel like—

gender the bag. Hey, count it up. My pronouns are me spend.

But what— how would you describe the color?

Okay, so I would describe it. It's a very It's a very distinct and kind of like pretty shocking blue.

Yeah, I loved it.

And it's, it's, you know what, I'm not sure what, what blue it is. I did notice that Loewe has exactly this blue in like one pair.

So it's sort of a primary blue.

Newly redesigned Amazona bags. It's sort of like a very striking— let me— okay, what blue is it?

Would it be cerulean? Could it be cerulean?

Yeah, because they have ceruleans, but they also have a good amount of baby blue bags as well as something with a little touch of green.

It's a bit— you know what, it's maybe a bit of an— let's see, ultramarine.

This is good podcasting right here, guys.

Yes, this is fascinating. I think it's an ultramarine. I think it's an ultramarine.

I thought that was a Frank Ocean song, but you're saying it's a color.

No, bro, that's Addison Rae song, bro.

Oh, I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

It's an ultramarine, and it punches you right between the eyes. And it has, you know, the classic Bottega— what's it called? Like, intra— I don't know how to pronounce it.

I don't know. No one knows how to say that. The weave.

I don't know how to say it.

Intrecciato. It's the woven leather that we all know and love.

The woven leather. And you know You know, as a young girl, um, I could never have imagined that I, Nomi Frye, would be toting around an Ultramarine Intrecciato Bottega bag from The RealReal. It was good value, I have to say. Shout out to my friends at The RealReal.

But is it for— it was a good value because you were using a credit they gave you, or a good value because of their, their great service and the way their business is set up?

Well, I just think it's, uh, it, it was, uh, I feel like it was like very good or even excellent condition, but the price was right. It wasn't— it was like—

thank you for using the real, real terms there.

Under $500. I don't remember exactly how much it was.

Under $500?

Yeah, it was, it was cheap.

Like, that is a great value.

It's a— that's what I'm saying, great value.

Next time, let me know, I'll send it to my authenticator. I'll say that, I'll say that these—

that's who's bad. Yeah, right.

Okay, I will say that I think what the benefit of this is, that blue color for someone like you swag works every day and it's— it works perfectly. It looks great. For other people, that would be an extreme flavor and maybe it was too far for them and they had to— they had to go to a black or brown because they didn't have the swag to pull off the blue.

Right, right.

And I think you benefited from lack of swag is what I'm trying to say.

Okay, great.

Someone else's lack of swag is your gain. Yeah.

A few follow-up questions. Naomi, as a— as a value enjoyer, you're not a bargain hunter, but you enjoy a good value.

Yes.

Were you concerned with the price per wear or the cost per wear on a handbag that is such a striking blue primary color that will not necessarily go with anything and everything despite your high levels of swagoo?

Right. I mean, I will say that my palette is muted usually.

Hey, shorty palette muted though.

I am currently wearing, as you guys can see but the listeners at home won't, uh, a gray—

was that Yeezy Season 3 or 4? I don't remember what that was.

It's easy. No, it's J.Crew.

Okay, so you're wearing a J.Crew sweater in gray, which is the most muted tone on Earth, I would say, actually.

So, you know, I wear gray, I wear like blue.

You wear gray, grayish blue, grayish brown.

Yeah, so I don't really, you know, I, I don't really do a of color. And so having that pop of color in the guise of this, this bag seemed okay.

I think it's great.

And like, I wouldn't, I wouldn't like— what I would be more concerned with, I know some people like get like a white bag and I'm like, how do you get a white bag? Like that for me, I'm like, so I'm pretty messy. I'm not like a pristine person by any means. So I feel like you have cats, for Christ's sake.

You know what I mean? This— there's—

look like shit, and all of your products are gonna open up and explode inside of there.

Yeah, like ink stains.

All of your Rhode Cosmetics.

Yes. A white bag is, is, is a person that has a lot of bags, I think, is what I would— yes, I would guess.

I prefer a white vial to a bag, just, you know, it doesn't, doesn't transport as well, but it seems like a more classy—

oh no. Nomi, have you been following along to the Packet Guy?

Packet.

There's a young British gentleman who's traveling the world and he calls cocaine packet and he's going to every country and trying the packet and rating it. And it's really, really good. I mean, he looks, he looks so British that it's insane. Like you couldn't have made him up in a laboratory.

Is he doing this on TikTok or Instagram?

I see it on Twitter.

It's across all social platforms, I'm assuming.

But it's across all social.

Okay. So you guys, this is what I'm missing because I don't know, we haven't discussed this, I don't think. But I am I am taking a social media break.

Well, I told Jason, I told Jason, you go through these ups and downs with, with the platforms.

So healthy.

What is the— yeah, what happens? You just feel crazy and they're like, I gotta stop.

I feel crazy. I feel like people are crazy. I feel like I am constantly checking it, like constantly, like a crazy person. And I'm just like, this can't be good. This can't be good.

Are you bricking or are you doing this natty?

No, I'm doing it now. I am just deactivating. I deactivated both Twitter and Instagram.

I looked up both of your Twitter and Instagram today. No results found, Queen.

I know.

So you're saying when you deactivate, you can come back at any time. You don't lose your posting history. All those John Mayer birthday wishes are still there.

Yes, I think with Twitter, I think with Instagram, you can do it for as long as you want. I think with Twitter, If it's under 30 days, then you can come back. Okay.

So you got to tap back in and then redo. Okay, sure.

I feel like I'll need to. That's actually a good reminder. I should, I should do that because I wouldn't want to lose the archives as well as the followers.

Sure.

Mm-hmm.

Who are near and dear.

I think you're obviously right. And, but I want to say that there is a fry-sized hole in my heart Thank you. Because, you know, some of your content is classic down-the-middle social media stuff. It really hits the nail on the head. You know what I mean? It's not controversial. It has personality. It has insight. You know what I mean? But also as a journalist now, your job is to promote yourself with your face online from what I keep hearing. So that is—

I know.

She lets the good people of The New Yorker do that for her, Chris, while she enjoys her social media break.

You're saying the Condé Nast Corporation doesn't have their foot on your— their boot on your neck to get those posts out?

No, they don't, so far at least. Yeah, I feel like what I'm feeling right now, this is not the intention. I'm doing it for me. I'm choosing me with this, uh, with this decision to take a step back. But I am maybe creating, um, you know, scarcity. Like, I'm like, maybe I'm actually thinking ahead, and once I return Uh, the, the hunger for my content might be—

it's called album mode. You're, you're giving them, leaving them wanting them, leaving them wanting more.

It's, you know, it's Olivia Rodrigo deleting all of her posts, which is very different. That is not my usual mode. Usually I just, I don't care about like posting a million times and stuff like that. I'm just like—

do you think there's going to be a time when, when the internet is going to be like, oh shit, Fry went dark again. New Vanderpump story coming out soon, imminently.

Yeah, she cleared her grid.

Well, speaking of Vanderpump, you guys, I— so first of all, Valley's coming back. Okay, Valley's coming back.

But who's participating is the question.

Everybody is back. I mean, Jax isn't back, I think.

What's the point, right?

Yeah. How do you think he's earning money from his—

we miss him.

The bar, or is that closed?

The bar is done.

It's done. Okay.

I think the bar is done.

His DJ career, like, he's probably—

he has— I feel like he still has— he might still have his podcast, which is called something like Measure of a Man or something. Okay, I think so. And also, you know, maybe he's doing appearances and stuff.

I'm sure he does the shit like that.

Yeah. And, um, I don't know, you guys are on social media, you should check in what, what he's doing. Like, if he's like announcing—

I just, I just Googled it. I saw The Valley Jax Taylor cancels entire podcast tour amid backlash for behavior. So the pod doesn't seem to be doing well at the moment.

I feel for him.

Poor fella.

I don't know, maybe he's finally stepping up as a father to young Cruz.

He's not gonna say— if you named your kid Cruz with a Z, you're a bad father. There's no, there's no coming back from that. That's child abuse. I would say that that's worse than some of the other stuff he's done. I, I'll be watching. I was pleasantly surprised at how good Vanderpump was. They found the, they were able to find 10 more of the worst people on Earth and put them into restaurant jobs.

And the—

God bless them—

the whole storyline with the two cousins and the OnlyFans, really good. It's such a modern twist.

Jason, just so you're clear, there's something that I can finally relate to on the show.

There's two hot cousins that they discover on OnlyFans sort of oiling each other up, not going all the way.

There's no hog touching, so there's no penetration, right?

I don't even think they're— I don't even think they're playing swords. I don't even think they're playing swords. I think they're not playing swords.

There is some touching, but the watching is plausible. There's plausible deniability as to the incest claims.

Softcore erotic incest, I'm familiar with the genre.

If we work out a lot together and my muscles are sore, I need someone to rub them with oil. Why not my cousin if we're monetizing it? I don't see a problem with that personally.

Yeah, no, I, I agree. And, uh, I love this cast. Like, I really, you know, it made me think a lot about things and kind of like get in touch with a lot of things about myself. It's, it's hard to explain. I felt— because I thought—

we're gonna explain it because that's a— that's a—

thankfully we have a long-form podcast to do just that.

Yeah, I mean, I will say I did write about it, um, that— so listeners, if they want to tap in, they can, you know, go to the New Yorker website and read my piece on Vanderpump, which came out like a month ago. But, um, there a new vulnerability to this generation of servers and, and barkeeps.

A new— this generation of food and beverage employees. Yes, which I felt was another pint of mead for my—

a lusty bar wench. Um, I— which, which seemed different and new and kind of interesting, and they were very kind of like, I mean, of course they're like dummies wanting to make it in the entertainment industry and they have these like mercenary preoccupations and whatever, but I felt like they really went in with the vulnerability and were kind of like, I mean, there's the character Shane who doesn't even work at the bar.

They, Jason, they found like a hot himbo sober guy who just hangs out there. He doesn't even work at the restaurant.

My third space. What, you guys want me to chill? All right.

He's the coolest. He's the coolest guy of all time because he— I love He's one of those guys who's like, I told her I didn't want anything serious, you know. I told her I'm not in a position actually to get into anything serious. I'm sober, you know.

I'm just—

it's a— and it works every time. It works every time.

And it works. But I will say that he's very like— and a lot of them are kind of very like 12-step coded, like very like, yeah, S.L.A.W. coded, like talking the talk. But it seems sincere, I have to say. Like, I feel like like Shane really suffered. Oh, I know what I loved. He was talking about his erectile dysfunction a lot, and he said— so he, he basically— so he grew up with a lot of drugs. His father, also named Shane with a Y, looks like he was like smoking crack.

Please, Shane's my father's name.

Yeah, Shane is my father. Um, he grew up with a lot of trauma in the trailer. He grew up with a lot of trauma in the trailer. He was like, by age 12, he was like smoking meth with like the parents.

And yeah, he's the kind of guy who did drugs with his parents young. That's the darkest shit.

It's so dark. It's like super dark. I don't know if he's from Florida, but it's very Florida. Where is he from?

No, it's giving Arizona.

Oh, Arizona.

So we got Gummo on the cast of Vanderpump this season.

Gummo, Gummo. But he looks like a Disney hunk.

Yeah, he's a hunk. He's a classic hunk from like 1994.

Hot gumma.

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Okay, a Home Improvement cast member.

Yeah, as part of his criminal, uh, you know, as part of his drug lore, he got shot at and he has like, you know, the, the scars to prove it. And okay, 50, because he got shot, it's not totally clear to me, but that's what he said. He can't get hard naturally, but all he does is fuck chicks. But all he does is fuck chicks. So the Viagra is like working overtime. And he said the line, I have to take Viagra. For me, that's just life. I have to take Viagra every time, and he's just like fully admitting it, and it doesn't take away from his whatever virility. Like, he's like, uh, you know, he's a guy, he's like a lady killer, but he's, he's fine. He's like, yeah, I can't get hard, it's okay, it's all, it's all good. Much like Jack Harlow, he's vanilla baby.

Wow, let's go pay some bills.

Yeah, I mean I think Shane is a rock star. I think also the— there's a— Jason, I told you about this— there's a woman on there that reminds me a lot of Emily Oberg.

She looks like Oberg. She really looks like—

she looks like yassified Oberg in a way that like freaked me out a little bit. Yeah, but yeah, overall though, I think it— I just didn't expect—

she's like the hottie.

Yeah, she's the hottest.

She's like the hottie, but she's also the most mentally ill probably out of all of them. Them, which is saying a lot, don't you think? She's like the most like troubled.

I like when she— I like whenever he got mad at her because she picked a guy from the airport and they were like, oh no, oh my God, you must really like him.

LAX guy.

Yeah, it's like this bitch doesn't work. Like, why would she not pick someone up from the airport? She's got nothing else to do. They can't Jelena.

And then she gets— she gets a boob— a boob job towards the end of the season.

She gets some big boy yabbas and it looks crazy.

Like, she was very pretty before and like well proportioned. She didn't—

she didn't go tasteful with cup size.

She went too many— she went too many CCs, not to use industry terms.

Too many units.

Too many units under the—

under the— under the muscle. I don't even know. I don't even know what that is.

26 double G under the muscle.

Yeah.

No, but it's just like, also, I think when— when you are on these shows and I see your like depressing apartment and you wear like a matching set with cat hair on it every day—

hey, not the matching set for me, but the cat hair, certainly.

Well, the best The worst part about her is that she also lives with her ex and you never see him.

Yeah.

So she's like, she's out here dating, getting new yabbos, picking up guys in the airport, but she lives with a toxic ex because they couldn't like figure it out.

Towards the end she moved. She moved from Beverly Grove.

Good dick is good dick.

Beverly Grove area to, I believe, West Hollywood.

Not a monumental shift in location, but yeah.

It was peace that a lot of them—

0.7 miles up.

That's a walk. As opposed to the OG Vanderpump where of course they all lived in West Hollywood. This was like 2013. In like shitty apartments, but they all, you know, were right there.

People living an hour away.

Yeah, they live in like— there's a— so Venus, who's like the, the gay server, uh, lives in Winnetka, I believe, which I— is like deep, deep, deep in the valley from what I understand.

I love the type of gay guy who's got prettier hair than a woman. Like, I don't really— I don't encounter— I encounter hot gay guys that just look straight most of my life. This guy has hair down to his back that the first thing Alex said when he came on screen was like, oh my God, like his hair.

And he's a redhead, but he's never had sex with a man. He did not have— never. He, he's been celibate for 7 years. That's, that's another part of like the vulnerability.

Let me ask you a question, Fry. Let me ask you a question. Let me ask you a question though. I mean, could you really— I mean, can you be gay if you're not I, I don't know. I, I, I—

so you're saying he's actually asexual?

I feel like you have to take or give penis if you're not performing the act to be gay.

I—

doing that once, I mean, right?

In a graveyard. He lost his virginity in a graveyard, I believe.

Okay, Danzig, that is unbelievable.

I could talk about this for like 7 hours.

I know these, these people are really they don't seem quite as dark, but maybe it's because it's early days, you know what I mean? They don't seem— they don't have the demons of fame yet.

Give them time.

It's not the demons of fame, it's just the demons of regular ass depressing life.

These are just demons.

It's just the restaurants are hurting. I mean, she just sold Pump and Tom Tom.

I know. Well, Pump, she's underwater, has been closed since 2024, I believe. But yes, Tom Tom is for sale. Well, guys, should we buy it? I mean, there's been discussion in some of the group chats. It's like, should we go all in?

Be cheaper than Allbirds.

I would love to. I mean, I think it could be— yeah, if we could get it for less than Allbirds and we could— I think we, I think we could reopen it sort of as a museum piece but also functioning as a bar. So nothing goes— I would say nothing goes to waste decor-wise. It stays exactly the same.

Run it like a Barney's Beanery. All the, all the charm is there. All the photos on the walls, or, you know, it's all there.

Jason, I think I should— we should actually fry— next time we're both in LA, I think we should have Jason do his sort of organic artisanal take on the goat cheese ball, the famous—

that's a great idea—

like, what would, what would Jason's chefy take be on the famed appetizer from the Vanderpump universe, the goat cheese ball, which is the most ordered on the menu? I've never had one myself.

I've had them a couple times.

I'm Googling it right now.

How would you rate them on a scale of 1 to 10?

Uh, I would give I give it like a 6, you know what I'm saying? Like, I just think—

It's giving bowling alley food to me.

It's giving bowling alley food, but like smaller portions.

Okay, so you're saying at a bowling alley, you really belly up to the bar, you get a fat-ass plate of goat cheese balls and onion rings.

Exactly.

Let me get a dozen. Keep them coming. So for our listeners at home, I just Googled it. It is a little ball. It's kind of like an arancini. It's just a little ball of goat cheese that's kind of crusted in breadcrumbs and fried.

I think it's like 4 to a— 4 to a serve, 4 to a serving, or to an order, or to another served alongside Sir's Mango Dipping Sauce. The mango dipping sauce.

But Fry, you would say these are— these are one bite. This isn't a two-biter.

It's not a two-biter unless you're like—

even, even for a female, even for a woman, even for a dainty woman.

I carry a purse and yet I bite— I bite down on the cheeseball.

Well, I mean, Chris— Chris will eat a whole biscuit in one bite.

Have you seen the biscuit? Oh, you're off social media. There's a— there's a big guy ordering Popeyes and he puts the entire Popeyes biscuit in his mouth like it's a chip. And people—

somebody, I saw a comment saying he ate that, he ate that biscuit like a DVD player, just like put the thing in his mouth and like a—

it's so good.

Oh God, the way he sort of flips it in this way, it has a lot of, it has a lot of sauce to the, to the ingestion.

You could— he's letting you know it's not his first time.

I want to hear more about the guy with the packet because it's just like a 20-year-old British guy wearing like a in a fucking Fred Perry shirt with like a bad haircut, be like, all right, mate.

Yeah. His slang is perfect. And he goes around. I like the irony or the double-sidedness of our friend of the show, Jeremy O'Harris, you know, getting locked up for having a little, you know, half a shmeg in his pocket.

Is he going to try this in Japan? Is the guy going to try it in Japan?

He's in, he's all over. He's like, I tried the Coke in China and, you know, I'll rate it a 7.6 on the classic scale of what I'm normally doing, you know, in London town. He'll do the price breakdown in, you know, in pounds and euros and the native currency.

So it's service journalism.

It is precisely service journalism, but he's admitting to crimes.

Does he also say how to score in different countries?

Yeah.

Yeah. I mean, it's not like here's the number, but he's like, all right, you go into this bridge and you follow this guy here.

It's honestly under the bridge downtown.

It's amazing. It's like Exactly.

Yeah. He's like, you'll find a man who's selling like hats and coffee mugs and he'll say, you want a shirt or you want a bag? And you say, no, mate, I want the packet. And he'll say, come with me.

It's so good. His accent is crazy. Like he's not from London, obviously. He is from—

speaks about cocaine like with a sommelier's reverence of the craft.

Right. It reminds me of like, remember when they started like there were like water sommeliers.

Yes, yeah, yeah, they still exist.

Just sort of like needless— or not needless, I guess, but kind of like the next stage. Like we're doing sommelier stuff now for like—

you can do it for anything, right?

Yeah, to me it's part of book report culture where we, we people— all the— a sect of people who can't just enjoy something or talk about something, they have to like make a— do a deep dive report on it and become a—

you haven't been to— you haven't been to SWIG, have you, Uh, in Utah. Well, there's— they have other locations, I'm finding out, because there's a new Chrisley show and they go in Nashville. Not, not that you're going to any of these places, but Jason and I have talked about Swig and he was actually quite interested in hitting— we will hit Swig eventually.

I mean, our friend, uh, Hannah Goldfield did a few months ago. She did— she went to Utah and went to the, like, the soda places, uh, and did like a whole, a whole— it's calm about it.

It's fascinating.

But I've never, I've never done it. And it also sounds like whenever they go in like Mormon Wives or something, it always sounds very gross to me. It's like really not my thing in terms of like same taste.

From a taste perspective, it's for people who are afraid of alcohol but want to eat candy.

They're not afraid of alcohol, Jason. Their religion doesn't allow them to have it, but they're allowed to have premarital— they're allowed to have sex with other people besides wife or husband.

And also they're allowed— they, when they go, they're like 22 years old, 7 kids, getting Botox for no reason. And but it's called preventative care, is that they want to do the nitrous because when, when they go to get Botox, for some reason they're allowed to have laughing gas.

That's— I need to find that doctor. I'm about to come back looking like damn Ryan Seacrest.

Well, the thing is they don't They don't have to get the nitrous. They choose. And it's another Mormon loophole.

No, no, they don't have to, of course.

Chris goes and gets LASIK. He says, I'm going to do this shit raw dog, like a man. Very impressive.

It's not impressive.

But these Mormons are like, give me the nitrous, please. Can I has the nitrous?

I feel like maybe that offer only exists in Mormon communities. Like, if I feel like if I went to Madison Avenue to get Botox, they'd be like, lay down, pussy. There would be no offer of that. There would be no—

No, I've never heard of this. I've never heard of this. This.

That's cool. Well, you're familiar, you're familiar with soaking.

Yes.

Who Among Us?

Soaking, soaking is one of the most twisted things ever to exist.

Did you guys ever, um, did you guys watch the first season of Jury Duty? Yeah, that show.

I did not, I did not.

It's— I found it very funny. I don't know what you thought, Jason.

Um, no, yeah, very, very good. I actually just watched the first couple episodes of season 2 last night.

Okay, I haven't. Okay, how is Does it seem to be as funny?

On the good side, it's still the same formula, still funny, still those crazy moments. On the odd, maybe bad side, the production value increased a lot, and now it looks just like The Office, and it feels like The Office.

Oh, I see.

So the premise is kind of like—

Is there a Dwight character?

Yeah. So it's like The Office. Everyone is an actor, except if The Office had one real, actual human being.

Who doesn't know that it's all like a Truman Show situation.

But the thing I like about it is it's like a prank show, but they're pranking— they find somebody who's just like the most genuine, earnest, kind, good-souled person of all time, and then prank them into displaying that on live television. So it's like very—

for like weeks.

Yeah, it's very heartwarming and earnest.

It was very good. The first one was very good-natured, uh, but also really funny, and it had a lot of funny, like, small kind of like comedians and in like small funny roles. And James Marsden was like the celebrity because it was a jury duty— it was the, the situation was a jury duty, and James—

Jimmy Marsden was like the, the celebrity who's put on a jury and is like playing himself, and he was just small enough to be plausible, and it was, it was perfect. But you, you were— but what does this have to do with soaking?

Yeah, it was really good. So there is a guy— there is a soaking— there's a memorable soaking scene where there's a guy who's like very religious, um, and is like, I can, I can get it in but I can't move it. And then Jimmy Marsden jumps on the bed to create friction and movement.

Yeah, yeah, that's— well, this is because sometimes I get, um, on my, on my Reels page, I will get the, the sort of man on the street videos. They do those at Mormon school campuses this. So it'll be like, at BYU, it'll be like a guy be like, all right, so like basically giving scenarios to hot Mormon chicks about what they would do, like bad things they would do or not do because it would send them to hell, right? And it's like, like the version— there's one of like the Hawaii campus where they just ask you what you're listening to and they say like weird Hawaiian music no one's ever heard of and it's like harmless. This is that, but everyone's saying something so fucked up, but they're they're like blonde hair, blue-eyed volleyball players, right? So it's just, it's a lot to take.

They're like, would you rather kill a black guy or jaywalk? And they're like, kill a black guy.

That's literally, it's literally, it's literally like that. It's so crazy. Like, would you rather have sex before marriage or kill your mom? And they're like, ah, sorry, kill my mom.

So long, mama.

So sorry.

I saw a video, unfortunately, because Mormonism just seems like a made-up loophole, and a lot of other religions sort of have these weird little things. No shade to the Jewish people, but you know, you're going to turn the light off for me and I can't do this.

Oh, sure. The Shabbos goy.

The Shabbos goy.

You can be my Shabbos goy.

I would love to.

That'd be a good job for Jason.

Is that not true?

And you're also tall. So if I need to like change the light bulb.

I could do it with such ease. I wouldn't have to use one of my devices.

It's perfect.

Yes. But all that is to say, now that we are in the AI tech space, you know, we've got robots running the world, delivering our groceries and stuff, I saw the Mormon Soaking Bed where it's literally a bed that's on these like AI-controlled pneumatic lifts where you lay on it and it like adjusts to the bodies.

Wow.

On the bed and it moves the bed for you in a way that might work out well for your soakage.

That's crazy.

That's smart. That's good. That's just good business.

But is that how they promote it or is it one of those things where it's like before women were allowed to have vibrators it was called like a neck massage or something. Oh.

Could be.

You know what I mean?

Could be something like that. I think soaking beds have been around for a while, and I think just now this new, the Gen Z is finding new ways to innovate in the space.

It's a collaboration with Great Jones. So it's in these great colors. It's like in some super great, like vibrant colors. It's great. It's great. Yeah. I just have been taking a bath.

Yeah. Soaking on stolen land.

Oh my God. Is there a more high thing? I mean, I've been searching for something, Jason. Goddamn it. Yeah.

There's a hat. I just saw a Mormon hat on Etsy. Soaking ain't sinning is their motto. That's the YOLO motto.

I'm getting that.

I always hated religion, but I finally found one and I can't be a part of it.

That's it. You're converting.

I would convert if it made sense.

Fry, I want to talk about a couple of things. First of all, I was listening to your podcast that you do with The New Yorker, you and two other people, not Just you, but Critics at Large.

Listen in.

Critics at Large, available wherever you stream a podcast. You did an episode a couple of weeks ago about Love Story, the JFK Jr. show.

Yes.

And, you know, sort of the general consensus was, yes, this show is bad, but, you know, my ass is still seated and watching it despite everything, like so many other shows. Has your opinion on the show changed now that we've seen all of it and we've seen you know, Mark Ronson's wife delivered these heartfelt monologues, and, you know, did they tie it up in a bow for you? Are you still a hater?

Okay, so I have to say I actually did not continue to watch. I watched like the first, like, I don't know, 5 episodes or something.

Okay, dude, I came in, I thought, I thought, um, Ronson—

I thought Grace, Ronson's wife, was good. I mean, I, I thought, you know, there, there are things to recommend the show, uh, Uh, it, it was— I didn't stop watching because it was like so horrible. I just, uh, you know, there's lots to watch, you guys. I got sidetracked. One thing I, I did enjoy with it, with in the show, was like it did like— I mean, it's nice to be taken back to the '90s. Everything is like so—

that's all that— that's I think the major takeaway. Yeah, is that that's what I think— that's what people— I mean, because this story is very well known. It's like there's new information being revealed in this show. It's like, but I came in Friday and fucking Alex was bawling rest of the day.

Really?

Rest of the day she was fucked up from the last episode.

Carolyn and I watched that last episode and both of us were bawling. I mean, wow, she was, she was crying the whole time. I, I will get misty if I'm like, if I'm caught in an emotional moment, I'll feel my eyes kind of welling up. Rarely do tears fall, but this The tear was falling.

Oh, okay, interesting.

Okay, well, I didn't know you were a bitch, but I'll— I will watch it. Um, I'll take it in and I'll check it out.

All because of Grace Gummer. Yeah, double G's.

Throw your G's up.

We gotta get Grace on the pod.

I saw that. I saw that Mark was saying his money's drying up and his wife is eclipsing him in fame and he's gotta— he's got to get back in the lab.

I need another— I gotta get back in the studio.

My fucking chick is more famous than me now playing keyboard, being I'm like, money drop, my memoir, Money Drop movie, coming up on 3 years now. Barbie's 3 years old, my wife's popping, I gotta figure some shit out. He's back on the queue. It's really funny, that's funny. But I, I don't think that, that— I think it's like, I mean, we were like, we live close to Tribeca, so we're like around Tribeca like every day. The weekends it's like white chicks are out here like wearing headbands, taking— like, I just haven't seen something something catch on like this in a long time. Yeah, that's the fascinating— it's like really caught on.

But is it better or worse than the standard sort of West Village girly outfit that has been, you know, repeated and done to death every year? Is it nice to have a little tortoiseshell headband?

Well, it's based on something real, you know what I mean? It's like based on something real, kind of. But I mean, I think it's cool for like a restaurant like Indochine, which sort of goes through waves lives, you know, like Indochine's probably packed every night. Like Bubby's is fucking— I mean, Bubby's is selling pancakes. Yeah, I mean, it's like, it's good for the Indian restaurant in the East Village.

It's good for the economy. It's a— it's a—

one of the Kennedys bad for the economy. What do you— okay, what do you think about Jack though?

Oh, schloss.

Because Carolyn has sort of admitted in so many words that she admitted—

she told me flat out, like, I'd leave his ass.

She's a— she's a— she's a schloss enjoyer.

I could upgrade to a Kennedy. It looks like Jason, same nose but more money.

You mean Like she's into him, like physically.

She's sexually attracted to Jack.

I mean, he's in a drama.

Do you mean that your wife is sexually attracted?

Nomi's like, what do you mean? What exactly do you mean?

Say it like you mean it.

Okay.

Say it what you mean. Use your words.

I have never actually seen him in person or met him.

I'm shocked by that.

What about just— I mean, she's not hanging out with him. This is all Instagram.

No, I understand. I understand. She is not making love to Jack Schlossberg.

No, I'm just saying you— I mean, I'm just I'm just saying you should be able to form an opinion on your attraction to him without having to see him IRL.

Yes, yes, yes. I mean, I mean, you know, he's, uh, as, as you guys know, I love an older destroyed man.

He's not old enough.

So he's not, he's not, he's neither.

Okay, so you said keep the schloss, give me my Hunter Biden any day of the week.

Oh yeah, you got good taste.

Exactly.

If we're talking about like sons and scions, for listeners at home, Nomi just got up and opened one of the windows in our house because it's getting a little too hot in Well, before you were on, because before you were on, Nomi, I was talking about I saw Jill Biden last night and she was looking good.

You saw her in person?

She was at Ruthie Rogers' book party that Michael Bloomberg hosted.

Oh, nice.

But also, Nomi, I was talking about, yes, of course, Jill Biden was looking good. But also, you know, I pulled up some old photos of them, you know, when they're in their 30s or something like that. And I remembered that Hunter Biden is the son of Joe Biden, and a young Joe Biden looks a lot like a Hunter Biden, but, you know, cleaned up, sort of the devil and the angel on either shoulder. So yeah, does that mean— I mean, who's more of an old destroyed man than Sleepy Joe?

I'm seeing—

I don't even know where the door is here.

I'm seeing something here. Smart, Jason.

Would you hit Joe Biden?

Jason's done it again. Would you, would you, would you sleep with Sleepy Joe?

Of like whatever equivalence or whatever it's called.

We ain't sleeping tonight, friend.

Oh my God, it's so good. What if it turns out I have like a huge crush on Sleepy Joe?

That's where this has all been leading up to. Yeah, this is what it's all been leading up to.

Well, I said to Jason, yeah, because these little, these Vincent Gallos, these Hunter Bidens, that's just a little stepping stone. It's It's time for the people who have been really in the trenches for a minute. Show me some real old dick.

You know what I mean?

Anyone can look at the— oh, Vinnie Gallo.

Yeah, he's sexy. Old dick ain't a guy that was a model when he was 20.

Are you really about this shit?

Yeah. Oh my God. You need to prove your loyalty to the old dick.

It might be time. It might be time. It might be time.

This is it.

Also, sorry for interrupting, Chris. On the subject of the JFK Jr. I recall you talking about something that I wanted to maybe dive deeper into.

Yes.

You were— it wasn't a complaint, but I felt the energy that you were upset that the chest hair of it all, you thought, we thought chest hair was going to come back, but now it doesn't seem like it's back. You guys were talking about how—

Oh, right. I know.

His character—

He was here. He is here. It was right. Brad Simpson, who is one of the producers on the show, who I actually ran into last night said that it was hard to find Paul Kelly. It was hard to find an actor, partly because actors are not as— their chest hair is not as abundant as—

hard to find a leading man who's still got a full chest of hair, right? Um, are you a chest— are you a hair hunter?

I don't know. What are— what do you guys think? You guys are more like on the beach, I feel like, than I— like, I feel like you guys are more more like you go on like this, like fabulous, like, uh, um, I don't know, like, uh, Palm Heights or whatever. I, I don't know, you guys are like with sort of hot guys on the beach more than I am. Like, what's your take on the ground about the stat— the state of chest hair?

I think it seems pretty good.

I feel like it's kind of back. Like, I don't think people are like plucking and waxing and lasering as much as they used to.

Yeah, I don't think hairy there.

Yeah, I think it kind of comes down to the hotness of the person. I think if you're a hot guy who has chest hair, you, you, it's the chest hair is okay. But if you're a schlubby, you know, kind of fat, random 52-year-old guy who's super hairy, maybe we're shaving that along with the back, you know what I mean?

But would that be, would that be better?

No, no, I think it doesn't matter.

It's a personal, it's just personal preference.

But in the, in the, in the style of the, the Rick Owens, the best accessory is the, is the body kind of thing, like whatever that hair is attached to will dictate whether or not it's good, right?

Right.

But are you a— are you a hair hunter is what I'm— is what I'm after.

I, I—

yeah, I would say I'm a hair— not like—

yeah, I would say— yeah, sure.

Yeah, it's not a— it's not a deep fetish, but you see a, a hunky barrel-chested man with hair, we prefer it.

Yeah, I think I prefer it. Yeah. But I remember— yeah, I remember, like, you know what, what— it's so funny, like, um, me and Nina have been watching the first 2 seasons of The Comeback because of the new season, which we haven't watched yet, but we wanted to be— I, for whatever reason, I only watched some of the first season when it first aired.

Me too. I mean, I know it existed. I don't remember a single episode.

Yeah. And then, and now, so we watched the first 2 seasons and it's like incredible. I mean, I'm not the— obviously everybody thinks that, like it's not like a rare opinion to have.

Right.

But the first season is basically, she's, as people who've watched know, Valerie Cherish, like the Lisa Kudrow character, is a kind of faded actress who's being put in this dowdy and sassy role on this hot, young, sex-crazed, crazy kids who are roommates on the show Room and Board, like a horrible sitcom. And it has like these two hot guys, right, like circa like 2005, and one of them is Kellan Lutz. Remember Kellan Lutz?

Of course.

And, uh, and, uh, I just— and they're kind of like naked all the time, or they're kind of like wearing like board shorts and like nothing else. And they're like such a— I, I, I zoomed back to that aesthetic of like the 2005 hot guy with with like not a single hair on his torso, you know, sort of like puffed up muscles, kind of like— yeah, Jesse Metcalf. Remember Jesse Metcalf from—

he's buff as hell. I see him in LA at the gym.

Really? Boss. Desperate Housewives. Well, I'm happy for him, but like, he was like the gardener. He was like the hot gardener, right? Yeah, hair.

But this is what's going on right now with Timothée Chalamet vacation posting. People are like, he looks like a 13-year-old boy. Why are you guys trying to fuck this guy? Because he, you know, his body is is— I guess they're saying it leaves a lot to be desired.

Yeah, I mean, he's a different thing altogether.

They're kicking him while he's down though, I believe.

Right?

Yeah, he's so down. Biggest actor in the world, fucking Kylie Jenner.

Yeah, he's fine.

Well, I mean, he literally sold his soul to the devil and didn't win an Oscar. Yeah, it's, it's not— I'm not saying his problems are the same as—

overall we're up, just we're taking a little dip right now on the market. Yeah, now's the time to buy on Timmy.

I think it's, uh, I I think it's, it's normal and it'll all level out.

And yeah, definitely the ups and downs. I mean, also, you know, it's like, but him and Kylie posting on vacation, they're not in the pictures together.

Where are they?

Some sort of beach location, undisclosed. I'm sure it was reachable by private plane.

Who's giving Maldives to me?

That's too far. I bet they're in Mexico. Okay, where all LA people go.

I wonder what they talk about.

Not much is my guess.

I think they just share videos.

You think They just, they email video, they like text videos back and forth each other from different rooms in the house.

They probably don't have time to talk much.

They're both moguls from different like lounge chairs. Well, like next to each other.

The big news today was that, um, enemy of the show Kid Cudi is releasing a new podcast and Kylie is his first guest. And Jason, Jason sent over a, there's a supercut of Cudi-isms that he posted that make him look like the dumbest guy. It's crazy that this is a promotion to get people people to tune in to this, this show.

Oh, amazing.

But I guess him and Kylie have been down for years, and obviously Timmy said, you know, Timmy's one of those guys. One of the quotes from Cudi—

what he sees in Kylie—

well, yeah, exactly. One of those quotes from, from Cudi was, I'm somebody in your high school's Taylor Swift. And I hate to say it, but he's right. Yes. You know what I mean? Like, people really fuck with him.

The only thing that sentence is missing is parentheses derogatory.

Go.

You know what I miss? I miss the Pursuit of Happiness video. Remember when like Drake pop up there randomly?

I'm so desperate for Drake to be back. It's the streets. We— Iceman coming soon. We got to feed the streets.

When is it? When is this coming? Do we know?

We don't know. It's, it's always coming soon, um, with no kind of hard data attached to that.

Yeah, I mean, all the, the ICE agent conflict has thrown a little bit of a, a wrench in his operation.

Emotional push.

Yeah, being the Iceman, not necessarily the best title to have in 2026. So maybe, uh, the people over there at OVO Industries are workshopping some new branding and marketing directions. I don't know.

I want Iceman. I think Iceman's gonna be great. I think Drake's gonna be back. I think it's— I think we're all— I think we're all going to be good. I think it's—

I think we're going to return to God's light in the very near future, back when Cudi had those little, little black nerdy glasses on and he was just an innocent guy before all the swag, before he became a fine artist.

Jason, if you had to— if you had to pick gun to head, Cudi or Lupe Fiasco?

Well, remember Lupe Fiasco?

Kick Push, Jason. Kick Push.

Which one? I'm gonna pick Cudi. I'm picking Cudi.

I'm picking Cudi too, but I don't feel good about it. Shout out to all our Chicago listeners. I know you guys fuck with Lupe, but Chuck, sorry about that. Yeah, sorry, Chuck. Yeah, you're Chuck, you're the GOAT.

Okay, no, me lastly, I a little quick recap on the, uh, on the 50th birthday party that unfortunately I was unable to attend. We were in Paris.

Yeah, you both missed, uh, you were at the sitting front row at the Loewe show in Paris. Yeah, I think, I think it was good. I think it was successful. It was a little, uh, I was a little nervous and, uh, you know, I Chrissy Miller, um, helped me, uh, arrange the party at the Submerser.

That's cool.

Uh, lounge.

Classic.

A classic.

A classic. And, uh, did Eli Escobar DJ, or was it just Ezra Marcus?

It was DJ Ezra Marcus was on.

Can he still— can he still fit in his shirt, or did he look okay?

I mean, because he's jacked now.

Is he good?

He looks great. It was great. They did a great job. Everything ran very smoothly.

They didn't have any door issues, 'cause I know there's some heavy hitters in the room, some not so heavy hitters, but they were able to mix together peacefully.

Yeah. Did Andy Cohen's Secret Service shoot himself in the ass as well? Just like Jill Biden's?

No, I mean, I was very touched that Andy and John Mayer came.

Well, they gotta, you know, they might be looking for a third. You know what I mean?

It's, it's one. It was very sweet.

Yeah. And who did they end up leaving with?

That's— no, I mean, it sounded great, and I— but I heard that it was— the temperature was quite warm.

It was warm, but it wasn't like insane.

Okay, it looked like a pit bull video on my Instagram stories though.

It was a bit of a pit bull, pit bull video. Dale, what did—

who, who dressed you for the event? What were you wearing for to celebrate 50 years of—

I just wore like this black dress. I felt comfortable. I felt like myself.

Okay, Carolyn set.

That's—

that was—

I just wore an LBD.

Effortless maxing.

I just wore an LBD with some flats. Something crazy. I just wore—

yeah, I wore an LBD.

Strapless or no?

Not strapless, no.

Uh, okay, which is cool, which is totally cool.

You know, slightly, slightly above the knee.

Okay.

Um, and breezy. Easy and breezy. Uh, I think people had a nice time. Like, it wasn't crazy, but I think a lot of people came. Like, I saw a lot of friends friends. People were very sweet, and I felt, you know, loved and appreciated, which was really nice. And you were, you were, you know, you were missed. But I— but fashion duty called. How, how was the show? I mean, I listened to the recap on the pod, of course, but it was, it was fun.

It was just—

it was— I learned that Paris Fashion Week is, is better than LA Fashion Week. I'll say it.

I—

you're so brave.

I went to Paris Paris Fashion Week for the first time in the fall. And I was like, Jason, I really identified because I had been to Paris before, but the last time was when I was 15. So I was really, you know, had a very vague sense of what Paris is. And I was like, I really love Paris.

You're like, I get it.

I had a great time. People are on the same thing. Being in Paris Fashion Week and like seeing people and stuff.

It's a great place for seeing people. I will say that it was the Devil Wears Prada come to life.

You know, somebody pinched it.

Was— I mean, it's kind of a big— it feels like more of a big deal than it does in New York and stuff. Like, it feels like very— it's kind of grander. It's very—

well, it feels like it has like the support of the government. Like, do you know what I mean?

Like, it's like it must be nice.

In New York, it's sort of a nuisance. In Paris, It's, it's, it is the event of the season.

You want to shut down the, the— sure, well, whatever you want. Yeah, yeah, it's a little more of that. Um, yeah. All right, Fry, it was, it was a pleasure, a wonderful surprise for not only Jason and I but also the listeners.

It's a surprise for the listeners. I hope they— yeah, I hope no one is disappointed.

Clips fans, we apologize.

Clips fans, Pusha T, Pusha T will be grinding with us next week.

Uh, but also Clips fans, rejoice face that unfortunately because of what we talked about on the episode, I will have to play Pursuit of Happiness by Kid Cudi as the outro song of today's episode. So stick around, they'll get a great— also, I think there literally, there is a Them Jeans remix of Pursuit of Happiness. I don't know if I have it. I don't know.

I think you'll find a way. Hit Jacques Greene. Somebody's got it. What do we hit? Somebody, somebody Cudi's got it. Is it, is it Them Jeans edit, a remix, a drum edit?

I think it's a remix.

Oh, it's a full remix. We had to all get the stems from A-Trak.

Reimagination. I got the— I think— I don't know if I have all the stems or if it was just an acapella reimagination.

Okay, got it.

Okay.

Yeah, but it'll, it'll light the club on fire.

Shout out to Kid Cudi. You had one, brother.

Um, all right, thanks. Thank you. Bless.

Thank you.

We love you and we'll see you soon.

Ryan Reynolds here for Mint Mobile. I don't know if you knew this, but anyone can get the same premium wireless for $15 a month plan that I've been enjoying. It's not just for celebrities, so do like I did and have one of your assistants' assistants switch you to Mint Mobile today. I'm told it's super easy to do at mintmobile.com/switch. Upfront payment of $45 for 3-month plan equivalent to $15 per month required. Intro rate first 3 months only, then full price plan options available. Taxes and fees extra. See full terms at mintmobile.com.